Today i feel better compared to yesterday. Yesterday, I hope to go a place which nobody know me, nobody can see me even contact me. But it was rainning yesterday. I was going to hospital. On the way, there was a uncle, he walked to me and asked me whether I need any help or not. Actually i was very scared, but I still answered him:" I want go to the St.Vincent Hospital." He asked me to follow him, i was scare, but i still followed him. He keep asking me question, ask me:" what is ur name? where do you live? where are you come from? go hospital for what? then introduce himself to me. OMG!! I really worried on that time. I want ran away, but i was not dare to do so.I went to St.Vincent hospital at king cross to visit a friend. He is ill because of the lung problem, but now is much better ady, mayb he can go home by today. Hope he will be fine and take care well of himself. Yesterday when i saw him, suddenly i felt very stranger, we dint chat. It's look like I just pass through the hospital not go for a visiting. I was moody for these few day, summore the sky kept darker, raining cat and dog. I hate my life, actually if yeaterday there was no rain, mayb i will go luna park, easter show or go for a movie alone. After that, I went to city alone. I went to market city. I went to "games centre", suddenly remind me some of the memories. I ate sushi alone at there. Bull shit~~ who told me that the sushi at market city are valuable!! the sushi are very small. I think sushi train is better than them. I cant find out a more comforatble way to abreact. I want to talk to somebody, but i donno i want to talk with who. I am very confused. I donno what i want and what i had done. I dint care about other ppl feeling, I just do what i want to do. Now only I realized that I am too selfish. Now, I do not need any guy to care about me, because I distrust any guy. Actually i'm a person who need care and love. I need the tender solicitude of somebody. Maybe i demanded somethings without measure. I am particular to a fault. I really donno what should i do. But now I feel better ady.